Six months is a long time! All the more so when it comes to gradually having allowed yourself to move away from something that defined a part of you.

I write this in order to fulfill a promise I made to a dear friend. A promise to write something before the weekend unfurled into another long week of work and chores! First things first, I thank you my friend, to get me to do this.

Typically, when I am excited about something (and I think this hold true for a lot of us), I make multiple plans in my head. The planning goes on to the point of not actually achieving what you had set out to do. This is probably going to be one way in which I justify myself for my lack of attention here (the blog). This is more of a consolation to myself than an apology to anyone.

All of us go out for shopping sometime or the other, inevitably. It could be an occasion, a random act, shopping for therapeutic relief or maybe (if you are like me), shopping because you read ‘sale’ somewhere! However, such trips aren’t always successful. “This is too big”, “I don’t like this colour”, “Do I actually need this?”, or maybe “Damn, its too expensive”, are a few of the common reasons to reject a particular product.

Then there is a different kind of market that one goes and chooses stuff from. In here, when you reject the ‘product’, the reasons sound a little different. “No way, his income is too less”, “Ummm, he doesn’t seem to have a dressing sense, right?”, “He lives in a joint family? Oh God no, cancel!” and so on and so forth. I was honestly tempted to continue listing more examples of this but well, I’m sure we all the idea here.

This is the Market of Marriage. Some get involved feeling like losers at not having managed to find a decent partner, some are here because that is what the parents deem to be fit for their wards and some are just here, as if this was the natural most thing to do. Again, the reasons are not the most important aspect of what I want to talk about. Whatever are your reasons, you are here looking for that one person who you plan to settle down with.

Putting all other thoughts about this process aside, the first thing that strikes me is this – it is scary. It is scary to leave yourself out open in the market as such. It needs a lot of belief in one’s self and patience to go through a period of scrutiny. Someone likes you because you look good, someone thinks you are at least better than the other options, someone thinks their parents will always know the best and thus they like you too, some are just trying their luck to see if you might say yes and some genuinely do like you. But the ‘you’ in this entire process is constantly being looked at, discussed and analyzed.

This I guess is the biggest mockery of all – the most personal and intimate of your decisions of choosing a life partner turns into a public event with your parents, relatives (yeah, the extended ones too),  and neighbours taking active interest in you!

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